My Biggest Decision- EVER

Deciding to retire from teaching was the biggest decision I EVER made. I still think back on occasion and question my choice.  I do miss teaching. I miss the students.  I miss my collleagues.  I miss the wonder I saw in my students eyes when we explored science. I miss seeing the world through a 10 year olds eyes. The only thing I don't miss is grading papers. 

I decided to retire because I knew I couldn't give my all to the classroom. I knew I would have to take time away from my classroom to have my treatment and visit doctors.  I knew that there would be days that I would have to go to school on a dex high or a dex crash and my students would have to deal with a less then pleasant  Mrs. C.  I knew that during cold and flu season my students would come to school sick and tell me that they didn't feel good as they proceeded to get sick over my desk.  I knew that my chemobrain would interfer with my ability to multi-task in the classroom. I knew that the old Mrs. C would be MIA.  I knew that being retired would be best for me and my students.

Today reinforced my decision. As I was sitting waiting for my Velcade a newly diagnosed myeloma patient and his wife were sitting next to me.  The stress that they were experiencing was overpowering.  The wait time in the infusion room was extra long today. It took over two hours to get my shot. This couple was still working. They were extremely worried about not making it to thier respective jobs, not being able to keep up with their job responsibilies, not being able to juggle treatment and work.  At that moment I realized how fortunate I was not to have those worries anymore since I was able to retire. I thank God every day that things worked out so I was able to stop teaching after 28 years of service. I feel for those for are not as fortunate as I was and because of financial obligations have to juggle work and having cancer.